When We Don't Trust What's True

People have many myths about God. Many people struggle with misconceptions about God.

• Some don't see him measuring up to expectations.
• Others feel he let them down or gave them a raw deal.
• Some are merely disappointed in him—he didn't show up when they wanted.

All along, God is there, waiting—wanting—to be discovered. But people keep missing him. Even strong believers have been confused or frustrated by God's mysterious ways at times. He surprises us. He doesn't act as we'd hoped. He won't fit in our box. Human perspective, limited as it is, introduces misconceptions and distortions about God that hinder us from knowing him more fully.

For the next couple of weeks, we'll look at what happens when we don't trust what is true. I hope we can move beyond disappointments and struggles from the past to renew and deepen our relationship with God.

There are a lot of hoaxes and scams these days. How many of you have ever received one of those emails from Nigeria—where you are promised millions of dollars in exchange for your help to get funds transferred out of Nigeria? It appears to be from a grieving spouse who has just lost her husband or from an attorney who is trying to help the family out...

Greetings and love to you in the name of the most high God, from my beloved country Nigeria. I am sorry and I solicit your permission into your privacy. I am Barrister Richard Okoya, lawyer to the late Ibrahim Abacha, eldest son of the late former head of state of Nigeria, the late General Sani Abacha.

My former client late Ibrahim Abacha died in a plane crash in the year 1994. Upon his death, he left behind $90 million to his spouse, Emily Abacha. Now Mrs. Abacha has been diagnosed with terminal cancer and has only 6 months to live. Since she is a strong Christian, Mrs. Abacha has instructed me to see that the funds of her estate be transferred to a minister outside of Nigeria who can use them for the glory of God... [Blah, blah, blah]

We know we should be careful not to trust someone who is untrustworthy. All our lives we've been warned about bad people who can't be trusted.

As kids we are told, "Don't talk to strangers." Senior citizens are warned about telephone scams. We've all heard the axiom: "If it sounds too good to be true..."

Hoaxes and scams are part of life's risks.

Picture: Runaway balloon. A couple of weeks ago, someone pulled a fast one on the entire country. With a frantic 911 call, Richard Heene had everyone worried that his 6-year-old son, Falcon Heene, was being carried away on a runaway balloon. Apparently the boy was never on the balloon. The police, the national guard, a news channel helicopter, and the national news media, however, all thought he was.

Now that the Internet has become so pervasive, hoaxes and scams will become more and more commonplace. We know the dangers of being fooled. We know we can be hurt if we're deceived. We know we should be careful.

Maybe that's why one day a famous politician didn't know what to do with the Jewish rabbi that was brought before him. I'm sure Pontius Pilate had all sorts of people appear before him—some good, some bad. Perhaps that day, Pilate was being extra cautious. Maybe he was on guard against being scammed. Maybe he was being so careful that he missed the very One who claimed to be the way, the truth, and the life. Maybe that's why, with Truth standing right in front of him, Pilate asked rhetorically, "What is truth?" and then sent Jesus away to be crucified.

How many people—like Pilate—still miss the truth?

It is dangerous to trust someone who is untrustworthy—but the opposite is also true: It is risky to not trust someone who is trustworthy!

• Trust someone bad—you can get hurt.
• Distrust someone decent—you can miss something good: a gift, a benefit, a reward.

When I was 5 my brother and I were riding our tricycles down the sidewalk in our neighborhood. At the end of the block, a car drove up and a clown got out. (Remember, this was 1955—which was a kinder, gentler, and—I think—safer time.) Anyway, this clown started performing magic tricks and blowing up balloons. In about 3 minutes, he had a whole crowd of kids standing around him. When he had a couple dozen kids, he gave out some fliers advertising the circus that had just come to town.
Then he started passing out little gifts to all the kids gathered around. I told my brother, who was almost 3, that Mom had told us never to accept gifts from strangers. But the desire to have one of those gifts became so great and the situation looked harmless enough that I told Robert that I would go ask Mom if it would be okay to take a gift from the clown.
So I hopped on my yellow tricycle and took off as fast as I could, covering the one-block distance to our house in record time. Breathlessly, I explained to my mother about the clown and the gifts and would it be okay if we took a gift from him? She said, "Okay," and I jumped back on my tricycle and raced back.
When I got back to the corner, however, the clown and his car were already gone. All that was left was a bunch of kids admiring and playing with their little gifts. And right there among them was my little brother—who had ignored my advice to wait and who had gone right ahead and trusted the clown. He got a gift, but I missed out.
Now you can say, "Well, wasn't little Richard a good boy? He obeyed his mother. He didn't get too close to strangers. He stayed safe."
But I didn't feel so good that day. I was crushed—so disappointed. All the kids got a gift except me! I was left out! I think the incident scarred me for life. To this day I have conflicted feelings about clowns.

All our lives we are taught to be skeptical and cynical. We are trained to nurture doubts about people and to be careful in unusual situations. And yet, if we're too skeptical or if we distrust someone who is actually good, we can miss out on a wonderful gift.

If this is true about our relationships with people, it's also true about our relationship with God!

• When we wonder about God's goodness...
• When we are confused by the painful or disappointing experiences of life...
• When skepticism or doubt define our relationship with God...
• When we are afraid to trust him, we miss out on the gifts and blessings that God.

This is why some people close their hearts to God.

• They've been disappointed by life.
• They've been burned in the past.
• They aren't really sure that God is really interested in them.

So they try to protect themselves from being hurt, and they shut God out of their lives. They're afraid to trust him, so they shut the door to their heart and lock themselves in.

³¹...Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. ³²Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." (John 8:31-32, NIV).

• Fear and doubt and skepticism will lock you up, but the truth will set you free.
• Disappointment and pain and hurt will imprison you, but the truth will set you free.
• Confusion and misunderstanding and uncertainty will hold you back, but the truth will set you free.

When we get a hold of the truth about God—when we can grasp who he really is and what he really does—then we'll finally be free! Then we'll be able to receive his gift of life! Then we'll be able to move beyond the hurts and pains of our past and live in the hope of his future.

1. A painful past can blind us to the truth.

Sometimes we may be so hurt or damaged by past experiences that we misjudge someone. This can go both ways—either it causes us to miss out on healthy relationships OR it makes us vulnerable to keep getting sucked into unhealthy relationships.

This is why some people seem stuck—continually going through a revolving door of destructive relationships. They seem to become magnets for bad people. They may escape one abusive relationship only to get caught up in another.

Why? Because their sensory system has been damaged. They have trouble discerning what's right and good and true. They think they finally have found someone worthy of their trust only to discover too late that he isn't what he appeared to be. And the cycle continues...

It's hard to trust once we've been hurt. Past experiences (good or bad) can have a long-lasting impact on us. They affect the way we interact with others. They limit our ability to tell the difference between good and bad.

Even if you've received healing from your past, scars can remain long after.

Did you notice some of the guys from Teen Challenge last week? We heard several stories, but there were a few who didn't need to tell their stories. Their stories were written in scars—literal scars across their face. One young man had a jagged scar coming down from his scalp along the side of his head. You didn't have to hear his story to know he had lived a tough life.

Here's the thing about the scars of the past:

• Your wounds may have healed, but permanent consequences remain...
• You are forgiven, but you may still feel unworthy...
• You have received grace, but you may still find it hard to trust.

Nerves in scar tissue have been permanently damaged. Feeling in those scars has disappeared or been drastically distorted. Sensations like touch have been desensitized. Where there is a scar, you may feel only numb.
Similar things can happen in our hearts and in our spirits. Sometimes the past leaves us feeling numb. We don't feel anything because our conscience or our inner spirit has been scarred. Sometimes, without even knowing it, we try to protect ourselves from further pain—so we turn off the pain and no longer feel anything.

Paul wrote to Timothy about people who follow "deceiving spirits" and "whose consciences have been seared as with a hot iron." (1 Tim 4:2, NIV)

Scars of the past can ruin our spiritual sensory system so we cannot feel anything so we end up being deceived and missing the truth.

But other times a painful past can lead to the opposite problem: we may feel pain even when there is nothing to cause it.

The original painful experience is over and done with, but we continue to suffer. The past is over and done with. We've been forgiven. But we can still keep reliving the pain as though the past had not changed.

Have you ever heard of "phantom pain"? Some amputees experience "phantom pain." Example: doctor removes a foot to save the rest of the body from disease. The foot is no longer attached to the body. The disease has been cut off. It can no longer cause any trouble for the body. But the brain keeps getting false signals through the nervous system—as though the foot were still there, causing pain to the body. The person feels the pain. It's real enough—though there is nothing there to cause the pain.

Similarly, "phantom pain" can occur in our relationships.

• The man who was jilted by a lover may live with so much pain that he will never again trust his heart to another woman.
• The woman who was abused by a step-father may never again trust any man. The pain is too strong, even though the past is over and done with.

If we've been burned in the past, it's difficult to trust others. And if you've found life to be a bitter experience or if you've been disappointed by events in your past, you may still be dealing with too much pain to really accept the truth that God is trustworthy.

A painful past can blind us to the truth.

2. Missing the truth means missing God.

Some people develop misconceptions about others—some to the point where they try to avoid crowded public places. They try to stay away from large, open spaces such as shopping malls or airports where they cannot easily hide. This crippling condition has been labeled agoraphobia (from Greek aγορά, "marketplace"; and φοβία, -phobia). In severe cases, the sufferer may become so uncomfortable about venturing out into an "unsafe" place, that he or she will stay confined at home for years at a time.
These misconceptions make normal life next to impossible. They miss out on all sorts of benefits of life because they feel unsafe out in public.

In the same way, many people miss out on the benefits of God because they don't understand the truth about God. Even if our misunderstanding is a small thing, we lose out. When we think wrongly about God, we lose out. When we cannot trust him, we miss out on the good things God wants to do for us.

Our misconceptions or confusion about God and his mysterious ways can undermine our trust in him and cause us to miss out on his blessings. It's as though we stay locked up at home—even though God wants us to know the truth so we can be set free! God wants to set us free from spiritual agoraphobia!

If our past experiences have distorted our view of God... if past pains and hurts have twisted our thinking or ruined our spiritual sensitivity, then we will miss God.

When we cannot see the truth, skepticism and cynicism take over. When we cannot see the truth, we will question God's ways and doubt his intentions. When we cannot see the truth, we will make mistake his ways and miss his blessings. If God doesn't act as we expected or hoped he would act, we are left with disappointment—instead of awe and wonder about his unfathomable ways!

⁸"For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD. ⁹"As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." (Isaiah 55:8-9, NIV)

[Job, after all his pain and trouble, had to admit to God] "Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know." (Job 42:3, NIV)

³³Oh, the depth of the riches of the wisdom and knowledge of God! How unsearchable his judgments, and his paths beyond tracing out! ³⁴"Who has known the mind of the Lord? Or who has been his counselor? (Romans 11:33-34, NIV)

People who don't understand the truth about God, can have a number of different kinds of reactions to God or to his works—all because of their misunderstandings about him:

• Some hold God at arm's length, never surrendering to his love.
• Others run away from God, fearful that he will hurt them or harm them.
• Still others ignore God, treating him as irrelevant for their lives today.
• Some even turn against God, fighting him and resisting him.

No matter which of these reactions (or others) people might choose, their reactions create problems for them. Not only do they miss God...

• They also lose out on the blessings they could have received from God.
• They miss receiving the love and the forgiveness God wants to give them.
• They don't enjoy the peace of heart and mind they could have enjoyed.
• They live lives of disappointment instead of lives filled with spiritual abundance.

Jesus came to this earth—God in the flesh—so people would be able to see God more clearly and understand him more completely. He came to show people what God is like. But even then—just like Pilate wondering what was truth—people missed God.

¹⁰He was in the world, and though the world was made through him, the world did not recognize him. ¹¹He came to that which was his own, but his own did not receive him. (John 1:10-11, NIV)

O Jerusalem, Jerusalem... how often I have longed to gather your children together, as a hen gathers her chicks under her wings, but you were not willing! (Luke 13:34, NIV)

Are we willing? Can we trust him to gather us like a hen gathers her chicks? Will we miss him or will we receive him? We can open our hearts to God and receive him if we know the truth about God!

3. Finding the truth means finding God.

When you find out what's really true about someone, then you can know whether to trust them or not.

If you could tell the motives and the intentions of every person you met—if there were a warning light on the person's forehead (just like on the dashboard of your car) telling you what was wrong (low oil, battery not charging, high temp...fake, charlatan, huckster)—you would never be scammed again! You would know whom to trust and whom to ignore.

If you could see inside the heart of every honest, upright, trustworthy person—if there were a window to let you see what they were thinking—then you would not have to be hyper-cautious or suspicious. You could enjoy the benefits of a wholesome relationship because you would know the truth about the person. The more we know the truth about someone, the more we know if we can trust him.

It's essential for us to learn to discern what's true from what's not. To discern right from wrong. To discern good from evil! When we know the difference, we can avoid being hurt AND avoid missing the good benefits of a healthy relationship. If this ability to discern good and evil is important in our dealings with people, it's even more important in our dealings with God.

The Bible talks about believers who have become "mature" (Heb 5:14, NIV):

• ...They are mature enough to know the difference between good and evil. (Heb 5:14, NCV)
• ...who because of practice have their senses trained to discern good and evil. (Heb 5:14, NASB)
• ...who through training have the skill to recognize the difference between right and wrong. (Heb 5:14, NLT)

We need to grow and become mature! We need to be able to discern the difference between what's true and what's false.

Because the more we know the truth God, the more we'll discover we can trust him! The more we know about God, the more we can leave behind all the hurts and fears and pain of our past. The more we find the truth about God, the more we'll find God.

When we know the truth, we won't have to miss God. The more we know God personally and intimately, the more secure we'll become in our relationship with him. We won't have to hold him at arm's length; we won't have to be afraid that he might abandon us; we won't have to suspect his motives.

The more we know the truth about God, the more free we can be. We won't have to lock ourselves up in the prison of our own suspicions or misunderstandings. The more we know the truth, the more free we can be! ³¹...Jesus said, "If you hold to my teaching, you are really my disciples. ³²Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free." (John 8:31-32, NIV)